10 Secrets About Men
Here's my take on what they and their sisters don't know about men.
1. You don't want to be judged for your looks; we don't want to be judged for our wallets. Unless we're ugly and have lots of money. Then it's OK.
2. You're not the only person who likes to be called "sexy."
3. Saying "I love you" is a major step in a man's life. That's why we wait for you to take that step first.
4. We are not being cheap when we make $35,000 a year and can't afford to pay every single date. We are merely being practical.
5. A guy who spends too much time in the gym is making up for something else that's lacking. Unfortunately, you can't figure out what it is until it's too late.
6. Don't get mad at us because we don't remember what you were wearing on our first date, or the angle of the light during our first kiss. We were probably drunk.
7. You're good in bed if you make us feel like stallions.
8. Jealousy isn't a sign that you love us more, it's a sign that you trust us less.
9. Hanging up on us is a surefire way to make sure we go to bed mad.
10. We're sorry. Whatever it is, we're sorry.
Monday, January 28, 2008
8 First Date Tips for Women
8 First Date Tips for Women
First dates are all about getting to the second date. Here's how to make him fall all over himself for a second date with youAs a love coach, I've heard the following question more times than I can remember:
"What happened? I'm so confused. At first, he seemed to really like me. He made reservations, picked me up, and took me to a fabulous restaurant. But for some reason, over the course of dinner, he became a little cold and distant. By the time he dropped me off, he seemed withdrawn and just sped off into the night. I haven't heard from him since! And I really liked him. I'm so bummed! What do you think happened?"
Does this sound familiar to you? If so, you may have broken some cardinal first-date rules without knowing it. Here are eight tips to ensure that a first date will turn into a second if you'd really like it to:
Tip 1. Don't be negative about dating. Why should a man pursue someone who isn't happy? It's ineffective manhandling to dump your dating disappointments on bachelor No. 3.
Talking to a man about how awful dating is just begs the question, "Are you in therapy?"
Talking to a man about how awful dating is just begs the question, "Are you in therapy?"
Manhandling Tip: Be a romantic challenge, not a mental health challenge.
Tip 2. Don't get tipsy. Always maintain enough sobriety to assess your date's character. Practice restraint, and don't have more than a drink or two when you're out on a first date. Otherwise, how in the world can you possibly observe him and decide if he's remotely right for you?
Manhandling Tip: Always stay sober enough to remember how naughty you were the night before!
Tip 3. Don't talk badly about your exes. I don't care if he cheated on you with your sister, don't recite a laundry list of grievances about your exes. This will only make you sound unavailable at best, or worse, wounded.
Reveal your secrets when you're both on a beach in Hawaii or, better yet, engaged!
Reveal your secrets when you're both on a beach in Hawaii or, better yet, engaged!
Manhandling Tip: We all have baggage. Keep it in the closet on first dates.
Tip 4. Don't spook your suitor. Now is not the time to point out your physical flaws. Only bring these complaints to people who can actually do something about them, and not to men who will now be forced to lie to you if they possess good manners.
Manhandling Tip: Confidence is sexy! Sometimes, thoughts are for the inside.
Tip 5. Don't talk about your personal pet peeves. Although your therapist might get butterflies inside when you talk about how traumatized you are by the staggering number of germs that thrive in public restrooms, the typical male will be horrified. You'll have violated the sacred air space of "romantic quality time" and these little monologues of strange pain will be as off-putting as if you started sorting unwashed laundry in a restaurant.
Manhandling Tip: You already know all about you. Keep your problems to yourself and get to know him.
Tip 6. Don't chase your date. Never deprive a man of the thrill of the chase. Besides, it's so much fun being caught! A woman can always initiate a first tea date, but after that, it's up to a man to decide whether he wants to pursue you. Entice men, play with them, and then release them! Allow men to initiate and take the lead in moving your relationship forward.
Manhandling Tip: When men chase you, they're much less likely to fly away.
Tip 7. Don't keep squawking. Don't feel pressured to try to fill up every second with meaningless chatter. If the conversation falls silent for a moment, don't panic, just let it happen. Natural pauses are sexy, and body language can be so much more powerful than words. Slowly smile at him and breathe. You may be surprised when he blurts out in the middle of a deliciously pregnant pause, "Come here and kiss me!"
Manhandling Tip: Remember, sometimes less conversation really is more.
Tip 8. Learn how to leave.
Anyone can be pleasant when they're enjoying themselves, but the true test of character is how one behaves when terribly bored
Anyone can be pleasant when they're enjoying themselves, but the true test of character is how one behaves when terribly bored, or worse, treated shabbily. There's nothing to be gained by suffering through a terrible date, so if you're having an awful time, depart quickly and gracefully, without being rude. When you're itching to leave, say: "Thank you so much for meeting me. I think it's time for me to go on home, Jerome. (Smile) Take care." Extend your hand for a quick shake, swiftly turn on your heel and depart.
Romantic Rule: If you're on date number one and aren't having fun, release men back into the wild immediately.
5 Steps to Disaster-Proof Your Dating
5 Steps to Disaster-Proof Your Dating
Read all 10 comments
If you want a dating life that's free from disaster, you need to invest in a little insurance. As hurricane victims know, it does no good to buy insurance after the storm has wreaked its damage. Here's how to get your own dating insurance package together:
1. Be ready. Some folks approach life as if they were jumping into a cold swimming pool: They squeeze their eyes shut, hold their nose and jump. Who knows if they know how to swim?
It's far better to go into dating with your eyes open and your senses sharp. Take some time and review your current situation. What needs attention? Your physical self? Your surroundings? Your fears? Taking care of yourself first will help ensure your future success in love.
2. Get a life.
Nothing is more unattractive than someone with nothing to offer.
Nothing is more unattractive than someone with nothing to offer. While having space in your life for a partner is important, too much space will seem overwhelming to another. It's not up to a future partner to give you the life you haven't made for yourself.
Get out and get active! One of the best strategies for getting invitations is to give them. Try entertaining. If the thought of throwing a party scares you more than dating, you can invite people to all kinds of events as your guest. (But you might as well get your domicile ready for visitors. Where do you expect to entertain a sweetie?)
3. Enhance your good luck.
Many singles are so discouraged about the process of finding love
Many singles are so discouraged about the process of finding love that they can't help but feel unlucky. And most folks feel that there is little they can do to influence Lady Luck.
But research has found that is not so. What you think and do has enormous effects on bringing you good -- or bad -- luck. Taking steps to increase your luck will help you find the best of the best. Listen to your lucky hunches. Maximize chance opportunities by varying your routine. Above all, expect good fortune in your life. What have you got to lose? More bad luck? For more suggestions, check out my Top 10 Ways to Get Lucky at Love.
4. Be prepared to tell the hard stuff. Often singles are so worried about how to tell bad news to a new partner that it gets in the way of doing any dating at all. We all have pasts, and none of us gets much beyond the age of 21 without accumulating a bit of baggage that we are not so proud of.
Part of getting ready to date is dealing with your truth and coming to terms with your life so far -- and what you have learned in the process. Tell the hard stuff now, before you are put on spot.
5. Toughen up. Do you want to avoid rejection entirely? Well, you'd better stay off dating sites, because rejection is the name of the game. Because you are jumping into a very large pool of potential candidates, you will be saying "no" to many perfectly nice people, and they will be saying (or acting) "no" to you. Saying and getting "no's" is part of getting to that big "YES!" If the no's are too much for you, you are in big trouble right now.
If you are still not sure of your ability to adequately insure yourself from dating failure, visit my Find a Sweetheart Store. You'll find at least one remedy there for every one of the issues I've written about here. Why not take advantage of my experience? I want you to get what you say you want: love!
3 Email Dating Secrets
3 Email Dating Secrets
Three basic rules
1. If someone else can say it, don't say it. Ask yourself if what you're writing sounds completely original. If not, the person you're contacting probably has 10 emails just like yours.
2. Cut to the chase. Don't waste time with a whole bunch of text that doesn't tell the recipient anything new. Look at this message:
Dear JB, I read your profile and thought it was really amazing. Plus, you're really cute. So please look at my profile and if you like what I had to say, write back to me when you get a chance. Yours, Evan
Every line of this message can be thrown out
Every line of this message can be thrown out. Why? Because anyone whom you contact knows by virtue of you writing to them that a) you liked their profile, b) you liked their photo and c) you'd like a reply.
3. Be flirty. Be confident. Be different. Keep in mind that YOU are the commodity here. Even though you're writing to someone out of the blue, do so with the belief that this person would be lucky to have you. If you're too complimentary in that initial email, you can come off as desperate and needy. So don't go overboard. Say a couple of funny, coy lines and get out. Your profile ultimately does the selling; your email just has to pique their interest.
How to separate yourself from the pack
Still, the question remains:
how do you say something original and flirty?
how do you say something original and flirty? That, my friends, is what separates the most successful online daters from the rest of the pack. Here are three steps to set you on the right path. In this case, I've written them for men replying to women, but the steps are applicable to everyone.
Step 1: Read her profile closely. Every word of it. Men who treat women as unique and interesting individuals stand a much greater shot of receiving a response. The thing is, even if she's interesting, she most likely wrote a whole bunch of cliches in her profile: "I'm nice, smart, kind, warm, funny, honest and family-oriented. I like hiking, biking, movies, music, travel. I'm looking for my best friend, lover and partner in crime for a lifetime of love and laughter." (Scary how easy it is to approximate the typical online dating profile, isn't it?) Obviously, there's not much to respond to here. So let's think outside the box, shall we?
Step 2: Find the most interesting tidbit in her profile. NOT the thing you like the most, NOT the thing you have in common. The most interesting tidbit in her profile is the thing that sounds like it couldn't have been written by anybody else in the world. It might be how she hates pigeons. It might be how she was once a foot model. It might be how she doesn't know how to program her TiVo. Whatever it is,
take her quirky tidbit and turn it into your pickup line
take her quirky tidbit and turn it into your pickup line.
Step 3: Take her factoid and apply it to yourself in a fictional fashion. The sillier and more over-the-top your email, the funnier it'll be. A good joke doesn't require an explanation - it's obviously a joke. For example, if you're writing to the foot model, you might say:
Once upon a time, I was a knee model. Great money, tons of fame, you know the deal ... Then I skinned my knee when rollerblading. I never modeled again. Let's drink to our fashion careers, Evan
Sure, it's a little goofy, but people actually respond to this stuff. Why? Because it's different, it's audacious and, in a strange way, it's kind of smart. Most importantly, it's confident. It's not an idle compliment or a generic, "Look what we have in common" line. It's a joke and, as we all know, people like people who make them laugh.
Wanna try again? Let's take the TiVo woman. Start your comment in the subject heading of the email, like this:
TiVo for Dummies
I can fix your computer, landscape your backyard and probably even hotwire your car, but, for some reason, TiVo programming seems to elude me as well. So if you're interested in watching the entire season of "When Animals Attack" ... in Spanish ... with subtitles ... I'm definitely your guy. Talk to you soon, Evan
High blood pressure and exercise: Why activity is key
High blood pressure and exercise: Why activity is key
High blood pressure and exercise are closely related. Learn how small changes in your daily routine can make a big difference.
The risk of high blood pressure (hypertension) increases with age. And like it or not, you get older every day. But you don't need to sit back and wait for high blood pressure to strike. Get moving! Regular exercise can help prevent high blood pressure, which reduces the risk of cardiovascular disease and stroke. And if your blood pressure is already high, exercise can help you control it.
How exercise helps
How are high blood pressure and exercise connected? Regular physical activity makes your heart stronger. A stronger heart can pump more blood with less effort. And the less your heart has to work, the less force, or pressure, that's exerted on your arteries.
Becoming more active can lower your blood pressure by an average of 10 millimeters of mercury (mm Hg). That's the same effect as some blood pressure medications. For some people, it's enough to reduce the need for blood pressure medication.
If your blood pressure is at a desirable level — less than 120/80 mm Hg — exercise can keep it from rising as you age. And there's more. Regular exercise also helps you maintain a healthy weight, another important way to control blood pressure.
The caveat? You need to keep it up. It takes about one to three months for regular exercise to have a stabilizing effect on blood pressure. The benefits last only as long as you continue to exercise.
What counts?
Flexibility and strengthening exercises are an important part of an overall fitness plan, but it takes aerobic activity to control high blood pressure. And you don't need to spend hours in the gym every day to benefit. Simply adding moderate physical activities to your daily routine will help.
Any physical activity that increases your heart and breathing rates is considered aerobic. Mowing the lawn, raking leaves or scrubbing the floor counts — as long as it takes effort. Other common forms of aerobic activity include climbing stairs, walking, jogging, bicycling and swimming.
Aim for at least 30 minutes of aerobic activity most days of the week. If you can't set aside that much time at once, remember that shorter bursts of activity count, too.
When you need your doctor's OK
Sometimes it's best to check with your doctor before you jump into an exercise program, especially if:
You're a man older than age 40 or a woman older than age 50
You smoke
You're overweight or obese
You're overweight or obese
You have a chronic health condition, including high blood pressure or high cholesterol
You've had a heart attack
You have a family history of heart-related problems before age 55
You feel pain in your chest or become dizzy with exertion
You're unsure of your health status
You've had a heart attack
You have a family history of heart-related problems before age 55
You feel pain in your chest or become dizzy with exertion
You're unsure of your health status
If you take any medication regularly, ask your doctor if increased activity will make it work differently or change its side effects — or if the medication will affect the way your body reacts to exercise.
Keep it safe
To reduce the risk of injury while exercising, start slowly. Remember to warm up before you exercise and cool down afterward. Build up the intensity of your workouts gradually.
If you'd like to try strength training or other resistance exercises, make sure you have your doctor's OK. Some of these exercises may increase your blood pressure — especially if you hold your breath while contracting your muscles.
Stop exercising and seek immediate medical care if you experience any warning signs during exercise, including:
§ Chest pain or tightness
§ Dizziness or faintness
§ Pain in an arm or your jaw
§ Severe shortness of breath
§ An irregular heartbeat
§ Excessive fatigue
Monitor your progressThe only way to detect high blood pressure is to keep track of your blood pressure readings. Have your blood pressure checked at each doctor's visit. If you use a home blood pressure
Diabetes and exercise: Take control with physical activity
Diabetes and exercise: Take control with physical activity
Exercise is an important part of any diabetes treatment plan. Here's the connection between diabetes and exercise — as well as how to get started and how to stay on track.
Thinking about adding exercise to your diabetes treatment plan? Good for you! Diabetes and exercise go hand in hand. Regular physical activity can help you improve your blood sugar control, as well as boost your overall fitness and reduce your risk of heart disease and nerve damage.
Learn more about how exercise affects your diabetes. Assess possible limitations, and keep your blood sugar on track as you increase your activity level.
Buy into the hype
Besides boosting your mood and energy levels, exercise leads to:
Improved heart health. Diabetes increases your risk of high blood pressure, heart attack, stroke and other cardiovascular diseases. Exercise counteracts the risk by improving blood flow, increasing your heart's pumping power and improving your cholesterol levels.
Improved weight control. Exercise can help you lose weight — and keep it off.
Get the green light Before jumping into a fitness program, get your doctor's OK to exercise — especially if you've been inactive. Discuss with your doctor which activities you're contemplating and any limitations you may have.
For example, if you have diabetic retinopathy — abnormal growth of blood vessels on your retina — strenuous activity could lead to bleeding or retinal detachment. You may need to avoid certain activities, such as weightlifting or jogging. If you have reduced sensation in your feet, your doctor may recommend non-weight-bearing activities, such as swimming or biking.
Also discuss with your doctor the best time to exercise. If you take insulin, you might need to adjust your insulin dose before exercising or wait a few hours to exercise after injecting insulin.
Exercise good judgment
When you're ready to exercise, start slowly. Work your way up to 30 minutes of moderate-intensity exercise most days of the week. While you're working out, remember to take good care of yourself.
Monitor your blood sugar. Check your blood sugar before, during and after exercise — especially if you take insulin or medications that can cause low blood sugar (hypoglycemia). Carry glucose tablets or hard candy in case your blood sugar drops too low or you feel shaky, nervous or confused.
Pay attention to your feet. Wear smooth-fitting socks and comfortable athletic shoes. Examine your feet before and after exercise for any signs of potential damage, such as cuts or blisters.
Drink up. Drink plenty of fluids while you exercise, especially when it's hot. Dehydration can increase your blood sugar. If you exercise for more than an hour, drink carbohydrate-containing beverages rather than plain water.
Identify yourself. Wear a diabetes identification bracelet or shoe tag while exercising, in case of an emergency.
Know when to stop. If you experience any warning signs — severe shortness of breath, dizziness, faintness, nausea, chest pain, heart palpitations, or pain in an arm or in your jaw — stop exercising. If you don't feel better within 15 minutes, seek immediate medical help.
Keep your eye on the prize
Try not to get discouraged if exercise causes significant changes in your blood sugar and upsets your normal management routine. Continue to test your blood sugar frequently until you begin to notice a pattern and can adjust your meals and medications accordingly. Your health care team can help, too. Once you understand how your body responds to exercise, you'll be even closer to a healthier you.
Tuesday, January 8, 2008
Lower Your Electric Bill
Electric bill got you down? Fight back with this energy – saving ideas
Keep your fridge and freezer full
Food acts as insulation and lessens the amount of time that the fridge has to run to stay cool.
Clear your refrigerator’s coil
When your refrigerator has dirty condenser coils it has to work harder to cool your foods. Perform maintenance once every three months to optimize its efficiency.
Don’t put uncovered foods/drinks in the refrigerator
Condensation makes the fridge work harder and costs you more money.
Allow foods to cool before putting them in the refrigerator
Placing hot foods in your fridge will increase the interior temperature and cause your refrigerator to work harder.
Only wash full loads
Your washing machine and dish washer use a lot of electricity. Minimise the drain by only washing full loads.
Wash laundry in cold water
90% of the energy consumed by your washing machine goes to heating water. Turn the dial to cold and skip the bill.
Clean your dryer lint trap
If you use a drying machine, remove the lint from your dryer trap after each load to maximize its efficiency. Then scrub it down with soapy water and a brush once every couple months to remove any additional lint trapped in the screen.
Switch to compact fluorescent light bulbs
CFL light bulbs use four times less energy than incandescent bulbs. Switch out the most widely used bulbs in your home. Then replace the rest as they burn out.
Shield your home from the sun
Cut down on your air conditioning use by closing curtains and blinds on the sunny side of your home. For even more savings, consider installing tinted window film.
Schedule yearly AC maintenance
Increase the efficiency of your AC system by having it inspected and cleaned once a year. Added bonus: cleaner air in your home.
Install ceiling fan
Keeping the air circulating in your home reduces the amount of work your air conditioner has to do.
Landscape for shade
Plant trees to shade your home and your air conditioning won’t have to work as hard.
Eliminate phantom loads
A surprising 75% of the energy used by home electronics is consumed when they are turned off. These “phantom” users include: TVs, VCRs, Stereos, computers and many kitchen appliances. Look for anything with a digital clock. A simple solution? Plug all of these items in to power strips and then get in the habit of turning off the strips between uses.
Lower the temperature on your hot water heater
13% of your home electricity goes to heating water. You can lower this percentage by setting your hot water heater to 130 ~ 140 degrees. For even more savings, install an insulation jacket, and insulate the first six feet of piping that comes off of your heater.
Install low flow shower head
Less water flowing through your shower head means less water to heat.
Cook with the lids on
Foods cook faster with lids on because the heat can’t escape.
Source: Home Builder
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